


Promised land

by Blackghost7



Category: NCIS
Genre: Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-12
Updated: 2015-01-12
Packaged: 2018-03-07 07:51:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3167198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blackghost7/pseuds/Blackghost7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A promise ten years in the making...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Promised land

   
Tony mentally crossed off the last box of the calendar in his mind, excited and nervous. The mental calendar had been his near constant companion for the past ten years, sometimes fading away and not thought of for weeks, but always returning. Whenever he hadn’t thought of it for a while and it came back to him, he took pleasure in seeing how many days he could cross off, but the pleasure was a bittersweet one, tinged with regret and longing and concern. The days and weeks he could cross off symbolized the time when he thought he was on the right path, but the fact that he was crossing them off now meant that he had failed, again. Each cross brought him closer to his ultimate desire, but he worried that when the day finally arrived, that desire would still be kept from him.  
   
Each time he met someone and started to get more serious about them, the calendar would fade, and each time the attempted relationship failed, the calendar returned with a vengeance, and he would mark off the weeks the relationship had lasted. Over the years, he had started to feel the futility of it all, but he had made a promise and he would keep it. He could only hope that the one he’d made the promise to would keep their end of the bargain as well. Sometimes he wondered if the other even remembered.  
   
~~~~~  
   
Gibbs had been getting steadily more nervous when that mystical day came closer and closer. He had been waiting and wondering, watching from the sidelines, and worrying from time to time whether he would ever get there. Some days, he cursed himself for his stupidity and his self-imposed selflessness which had kept him away for all these years, other times he felt he had been right in his decision and that appeased him when he felt the overwhelming need trying to burst out of his skin and shatter him into a million pieces.  
   
His need and want had been steadily growing, even though he had not thought it possible at the time, burning with desire as he had been then. But over the years it had become deeper and more significant, a very important part of his life, one he knew he couldn’t live without anymore, one that helped define him, even if no one knew about it. And now that the day was getting nearer, his excitement and his worry were building. Sometimes he wondered if the other even remembered.  
   
~~~~~  
   
Tony had only been on Gibbs’ team for a couple of months, which they had mostly spent together after Gibbs had gotten rid of Vivian Blackadder and before they finally found Cait. Working together so closely every day, Tony had been surprised when Gibbs had invited him over for steaks and bourbon one evening, figuring that the older man must be getting sick of his company by now after all those long days spent together, already having understood that his boss was a private man who didn’t let many people in. Curious at the invitation, and even more curious about the man, he had gladly accepted and they had spent a pleasant and companionable evening. After dinner, Gibbs had taken Tony down to the basement and the younger man had been fascinated by the boat, spending the rest of the night almost spellbound watching his boss work on the wood.  
   
The invitations came more frequently and Tony always accepted, following his boss home like an eager puppy, watching the boat slowly change from a mere skeleton to the shape of an actual boat, meanwhile getting more and more impressed and intrigued by the older man. He watched the play of muscles under the long sleeved shirts and on warm nights, found his gaze fixed on the damp spots that would appear on the older man’s back and chest while he worked, a fine sheen of perspiration on Gibbs’ face and neck, and needing to suppress the desire to walk over to lick it off and taste the older man. After a couple of weeks, Tony had started showing up at Gibbs’ place even when no invitation had been issued, and his boss never sent him away or indicated that he wasn’t welcome, so Tony kept turning up and indulged himself in his infatuation for his boss.  
   
And so it was after a couple of months, that Tony finally gave in to his desire. One evening, having sat on the basement stairs for a few hours watching and wanting the older man, Tony got up and strode over to his boss. Putting his hand on the man’s shoulder, Tony turned Gibbs around, seeing surprise and curiosity on the older man’s face. Swooping in before Gibbs had a chance to register his intentions, Tony locked his lips on those of his boss and poured everything he had into the kiss, nibbling his lips softly and coaxing them apart so he could slip his tongue inside, dancing around in Gibbs’ mouth and tasting the older man at last. To his relief and excitement, Gibbs reciprocated and slid his arms around Tony’s waist, pulling the younger man closer to him and tangling their tongues together. The kiss lasted long minutes before Gibbs broke away and put some distance between them.  
   
“This is a mistake, Tony. We shouldn’t do this.”  
   
“Why not? I want you, and from what I just felt, you want me too.”  
   
“Several reasons.”  
   
“Enlighten me.”  
   
Sighing deeply, Gibbs turned away and walked over to the workbench, grabbing his cup and emptying a jar, and pouring a good helping of bourbon in each before handing a cup to Tony.  
   
“Sit.”  
   
Obediently, Tony pulled up a sawhorse and sat down, studying the older man intently and ready to refute whatever reasons Gibbs would give him.  
   
“I’m your boss. I’m a bastard. I’m older than you.”  
   
“I can keep work and play separated, boss. I already know that you can be a bastard, but I don’t care, I can handle that. And I really don’t care how old you are, you’re hot and I want you.”  
   
“I don’t do casual, Tony.”  
   
“Good, because I don’t think once will be enough.”  
   
“I just got divorced for the third time.”  
   
“I just had my engagement ring thrown back in my face. I don’t see why that matters. Just means that we’re both unattached.”  
   
“There are things in my past that can ruin everything. My life is… difficult.”  
   
“Like I’ve had it easy? We all have a past, Gibbs. We can handle it together.”  
   
“I don’t date co-workers.”  
   
“That’s just stupid.”  
   
“You’re still young. You’ve hardly seen anything of what’s out there in the world. And I’m not gonna stand in your way to finding love and the chance at a family of your own. You deserve that.”  
   
“I’ve always been one to recognize what I want when I see it, Gibbs. And that’s you. I don’t want kids.”  
   
“You say that now, but a time will come when you do. A wife and child are precious things, Tony. And you will regret not having tried to find that when you’re older.”

“I can live with regret as long as I have you.”  
   
Smiling, Gibbs had to admit that the younger man was persistent. But Gibbs’ word was final.  
   
“It’s not gonna happen, Tony.”  
   
Tony had learned to recognize that tone in the past few months, and heard the finality in Gibbs’ voice. He couldn’t believe it. He had clearly felt the older man’s desire as they were pressed together, had seen it in his eyes and on his face, had tasted it in his mouth and on his tongue. But Gibbs was shutting him out, and that tone told him the older man was dead serious. He suddenly felt miserable and dejected, and it clearly showed on his face. In a flash, he wondered if he should start looking for another job tomorrow, but Gibbs hadn’t implied anything about that. Trying to find out, he looked up at his boss.  
   
Gibbs saw the disappointment and hurt in Tony’s eyes as soon as he looked up, as clearly written there as the dejection was evident from his slumped posture. He really felt like a bastard now, having first kissed Tony back, and now shooting him down, but it really was for the best. He cursed himself for having lost himself in the kiss, but he hadn’t been able to help himself. He had wanted Tony so much and he had felt so good, that for a few moments he allowed himself the pleasure of tasting and feeling the younger man. And now he was paying the price for his loss of control. Seeing Tony hurting made his own heart ache, and he reached out his hand and cupped the younger man’s cheek, keeping his gaze locked on Tony’s eyes, and spoke before he really knew what he was saying.  
   
“Tell you what, Tony. This isn’t going to happen now, but… You go out into the world, try and find your soul mate, see what life brings you. Search for happiness and love, and be open to it. And if you don’t find it, and you still want this...” – gesturing between himself and Tony with his other hand – “… then come back to me, and we’ll see.”  
   
“How long?”  
   
“You’re still so young, and there’s so much for you to discover…”  
   
“How long??”  
   
“Ten years. Give it ten years.”  
   
Tony stared at him wide-eyed and dismayed. Ten years? Gibbs was refusing him for ten years? Unbelievable! What a bastard! And then he laughed ruefully. Yes, Gibbs was a bastard. He’d said so himself. And Tony had replied that he could handle that. Well, time to show both Gibbs and himself that he could.  
   
“Fine, Gibbs. Ten years. See you tomorrow.”  
   
And then he pulled back, downed the remainder of his bourbon and left.  
   
~~~~~  
   
When Tony had left that evening, he had thought to himself that it wouldn’t be that bad. He had felt Gibbs’ reaction to him, and was sure that the older man could never refuse him for too long. It may take a couple of weeks or maybe even months – Gibbs was a stubborn bastard after all – but Tony would get him to forget about this crazy idea of Gibbs’ that Tony should be looking for love elsewhere. He knew he would have to take it slow and keep it unobtrusive at first, after all he had made a promise, but he also knew he would manage to get under the older man’s skin and into his heart, and he would get what he wanted.  
   
So in the days and weeks following that evening, Tony had done his best to keep his behavior normal, and neither man ever alluded to the kiss they had shared. When weeks turned into months, Tony started dropping hints about dates he’d had, but Gibbs never responded with anything other than a glare that merely told him to stop yapping and get back to work. When Cait joined them, and later McGee, it became easier, because now Tony had an audience – if unappreciative – for his stories about his exploits, and he elaborated and embellished, just to show Gibbs that he was keeping his promise. And if after a while some of the attraction between the two of them started seeping through in the form of inconspicuous flirting and discreet looks, neither acknowledged it and the others didn’t notice.  
   
Both men came close to breaking their pact a few times in those early years, when Tony had the plague, when Cait died, when they nearly lost each other to snipers’ bullets or serial killers, but they always held back at the last moment. Tony still showed up in Gibbs’ basement, although less frequently than in those first few months, and while there was always something between them, it wasn’t like it had been then. And when Gibbs got blown up and went to Mexico, his memory full of holes and the team a lot the wiser about the man’s troubled past, Tony was almost relieved that they weren’t together, because he knew it would have killed him to have to go through that if he had been the older man’s lover then. It was hard enough as it was. And he seethed with jealousy whenever one of those ever present women threw herself at Gibbs, and the older man actually accepted their invitation for a while.  
   
Gibbs watched from a distance as Tony put himself out there, ached when Tony got serious about someone while he still hoped that it would work out for the younger man, then aching for him in sympathy when it didn’t. Sometimes he had trouble containing his jealousy and lashed out, but still always supported Tony in any way he could. And when Tony was sent away as agent afloat, Gibbs knew his feelings for the younger man had only grown stronger, and did everything he could to get him back, fully intending to break their pact, but again retreating at the last moment.  
   
Over the years Tony learned more and more about his boss, and about himself, and those few introspective evenings he allowed himself once in a while told him that Gibbs had been right at the time to refuse him, refuse them, even though it hurt. When he was honest with himself, he knew that if they had gotten together then, they probably wouldn’t have lasted. He was still too immature back then, and would have let Gibbs’ moods and stubbornness push him away, but now he knew better, knew Gibbs better and knew himself better. After all they had been through, he knew they could handle anything together.  
   
And so, the past few months, he had started preparing for this day. He hadn’t dated anyone anymore, though that had dwindled down anyway over the last few years, and he had been studying his boss more closely again, like he had in those early days. He had been looking for signs that Gibbs had not forgotten the promise they had made, but hadn’t been able to discover anything conclusive either way. And that was why he was both worried and nervous. What if Gibbs didn’t want him anymore?  
   
~~~~~  
   
That last day happened to be an ordinary Friday late in October, already a cold nip in the air and autumn leaves swirling across the pavements in the gentle but chilly breeze. They had been on cold cases for the past three days, and Tony prayed nothing would come in that Friday, especially since they were not on call that weekend. And he had plans. Important plans. Life changing plans.  
   
His prayers answered, Gibbs sent them home at four that afternoon at the end of their shift, and Tony hurried out to make his final preparations, unaware of the gaze of his boss following him as he made his way to the elevator, hope and longing in his eyes. Tony stopped at the grocery store on his way home to pick up the last few items he needed, then hurried home to prepare. He had started planning for this weeks ago, thinking about what he would say, what he would wear, what he would do. And when he had decided, he had even practiced a few times, though he would of course never admit that. He had decided that he would prepare dinner for them, take it over to Gibbs’ house and simply tell the older man that his feelings hadn’t changed and that he still wanted him, wanted to be with him. Knowing Gibbs liked simple foods, he had selected a stew for dinner, easily prepared in advance and reheated, and had made it twice before to make sure it would be good. The stew was ready and just waiting for the final touches, the clothes he had selected were already laid out on his bed, and all he had to do was shower and shave, dress, and pack everything to take over to Gibbs’.  
   
Once showered and shaved, he studied himself in the mirror for a few moments, taking in the lines around his eyes and the few grey hairs at his temples, the few additional pounds on his frame, and wondered for a second if Gibbs would still find him attractive, would still have the same reaction to him as he had had ten years ago. Then he thought of Gibbs and realized that he was only more attracted to the older man now than he had been then, and appeased his worried thoughts with that. Fixing his hair and brushing his teeth, he went to the bedroom and changed into his favorite pair of faded jeans, soft from wear and wash, and the green button down shirt that he always thought complimented his eyes. Then moving to the kitchen, he packed up the stew and the last supplies and drove over to Gibbs’ place. He had figured that Gibbs would stay at the office for another hour or two after he had sent the team home, like he usually did, so Tony would have time to set up. But he was in for a surprise.  
   
When he arrived, there was soft light shining through the living room windows of Gibbs’ house. Wondering and a little worried, he grabbed his go-bag and box with food, and made his way inside. Putting down his bag in the hall and rushing straight to the kitchen to put down the box with the food, he returned to the hall to hang up his coat and then called out.    
   
“Gibbs?”  
   
“In here, Tony.”  
   
Following the sound of Gibbs’ voice, Tony stepped into the living room and his jaw nearly dropped to the floor. A fire was blazing in the fireplace and the soft light came not only from the dimly lit lamps in the corners and the roaring fire, but also from a couple of lit candles spread around on the coffee table and side tables. Gibbs was standing at the fireplace, bent over a little to poke the logs, and Tony nearly started salivating at the sight. Gibbs was dressed in black jeans that practically hugged his ass, deliciously on display for Tony to gawk at as he was bent over, and wore a blue dress shirt, the sleeves rolled up to show his bare forearms. When Gibbs replaced the poker in the stand and straightened up, turning to face him, all Tony’s careful plans flew out the window.  
   
Gibbs had a tiny, soft smile on his face, which became a little wider when he saw Tony’s reaction. He had rushed home as soon as his team had left, and quickly showered and shaved, then dressed in these carefully selected clothes he thought Tony would like, and went downstairs to prepare the rest. Fire, candles, setting the table. He had steaks in the fridge and a bottle of wine and glasses ready in the living room, thinking they would talk a little first before they had dinner, see how this would go. But seeing Tony standing there ogling him, the younger man’s eyes widened and darkened with lust, he couldn’t help hoping that they would do something else first, even if he knew that they did need to talk. Tony did not disappoint.  
   
Striding over purposefully, Tony reached out his hands and cupped Gibbs’ cheeks, then started nibbling at Gibbs’ lips, needing enormous restraint to keep himself from simply devouring the older man’s mouth. But when Gibbs responded immediately and slid his hands from Tony’s shoulders to his waist and then his hips, pulling them close together, Tony’s control frayed rapidly and soon their tongues were dueling for dominance, each giving and taking, meshing their mouths together frantically. Tony’s hands slid from Gibbs’ cheeks to his neck and into his hair, their chests now pressing together tightly, Gibbs’ head held in place by Tony’s hands and arms as he ravished the older man’s mouth. It lasted long, long minutes before they finally broke apart, breathing heavily and regarding each other with lust filled eyes.  
   
After clearing his throat twice, Tony managed to speak first.  
   
“I guess we’re on the same page here.”  
   
“Guess so.”  
   
“Thank God.”  
   
“Uh huh.”  
   
This time Gibbs initiated the kiss. It was a little calmer and a little more gentle, but all the more intense for it. When they broke apart again, they were panting heavily, and both were noticeably hard, pressing their lengths against each other and moaning at the sensations.  
   
“Jethro?”  
   
“Hmmm?”  
   
“I really want you now.”  
   
“Want you too.”  
   
“But I had plans…”  
   
“I have plans with you too.”  
   
A soft groan of anticipation escaped Tony’s lips at that gruff promise. Still, Tony forced himself to continue.  
   
“We should… we should do this right. I want to enjoy seeing you like this a little more first. I don’t get to see it very often.”  
   
Gibbs chuckled.  
   
“Play your cards right and you’ll see it any time you want.”  
   
Another groan from Tony, this time it was almost desperate.  
   
“Please Jethro… stop saying things like that if you want me to retain some semblance of self-control.”  
   
“I like you out of control.”  
   
When Tony almost whimpered – not that he would ever admit to that – Gibbs chuckled again and gently untangled them from each other before taking a deep breath to settle himself a little and speaking.  
   
“Okay, doin’ it right. Dinner first?”  
   
Making a visible effort to control himself, which only served to excite Gibbs more in the knowledge that Tony was so lost because of wanting him, Tony stepped back another few feet to create some more distance between them, then looked at Gibbs again and replied.  
   
“Dinner. I brought dinner. Just need to warm it up.”  
   
Gibbs nodded and Tony retreated to the kitchen. If Tony had made dinner, the steaks could wait until tomorrow, Gibbs figured. Gibbs checked the fire, then poured two glasses of the red wine he had ready and followed Tony to the kitchen. After handing Tony one of the glasses, Gibbs leaned back against the counter, sipping at his own wine, and watched the younger man unpack the box and put the food on the stove to warm up again. Chopping a few fresh herbs for the final finish and taking out the fresh rolls he’d picked up on the way home, Tony felt Gibbs’ gaze on him the entire time. Gibbs almost lounged against the counter, drinking in every detail of the beautiful young man, admiring his fluid movements, and laughed when he saw a faint blush creep up Tony’s neck and cheeks and his head duck down under the intense scrutiny of Gibbs’ eyes. When Tony looked up at him upon hearing the laughter, Gibbs reached out his hand to brush his fingers softly over Tony’s cheek and leaned in for a quick, chaste kiss, loving that when he pulled back, Tony’s lips unconsciously followed his a little and Tony’s eyes sparkled with pleasure.  
   
When the stew was heated through and Tony deemed it finished, Gibbs took their glasses and the rolls and led Tony to the dining room where Gibbs had set the table, then quickly retrieved the bottle of wine from the living room and lit the candles on the table. Gibbs had worried for a moment about all the candles, thinking it maybe a little too sappy and romantic, but when he saw the pleased little smile on Tony’s face when the younger man took it all in, he was glad he had decided to go for it anyway. Tony served and waited worriedly until Gibbs had taken his first bite, then smiled widely in satisfaction and pleasure when Gibbs moaned around the spoonful of stew in appreciation.  
   
Dinner was a quiet affair, hardly any words were spoken, and the air was thick with anticipation of things to come. Every now and then the desire to touch became too great, and one or the other reached out a hand to stroke softly across the other’s fingers or cheek, stealing a kiss every now and then. They ate slowly, savoring both the food and the anticipation, and heated looks were exchanged all throughout dinner. When they were finally done, they quickly cleared the table and went back to the living room where Gibbs poured them each a few fingers of bourbon, the good stuff, and they settled on the couch after having tended to the fire until it was blazing away again.  
   
In the soft light of the fire and candles, the crackling flames providing a gentle background noise, they sat in silence for a while, turned towards each other, one arm on the back of the couch, their fingers playing with each other as their gazes held each other captive. The heat and desire between them was rising steadily, even with that minimal touch, and it was barely half an hour before Tony put down his drink and slowly moved in. Gibbs put his glass aside blindly and reached for Tony as soon as the younger man began to move. Their lips met gently, and they took long minutes to nibble and lick before at last opening their mouths and letting their tongues play as well. Their hands caressed each other softly, and they crawled closer together until their bodies were touching, and when Gibbs leaned back Tony followed, resting on top of the older man, reveling in the feel of the gentle strokes of Gibbs’ hands over his back and sides while their tongues played.  
   
The slow build of heat turning into a blazing fire between them, they both knew the time had come. Moving together as always, they got up and went upstairs. Once in the bedroom, they slowly undressed each other, kissing and caressing, before sliding under the covers. They explored each other thoroughly, keeping it slow and tender, loving and gentle. When Gibbs at last settled between Tony’s legs and buried himself inside his lover, it was the culmination of a ten year build-up of love and desire for both. It might have lasted minutes, hours, or a lifetime, neither could tell.  
   
Afterwards, they lay curled together, and without speaking, each knew that it had been right to take this path. They were now ready for each other in ways they hadn’t been ten years ago, and knew each other in ways they could never have back then. Their connection was unbreakable now, and nothing would come between them ever again.  
   
And Tony at last had reached the promised land, and knew that he would stay there forever, the man he loved by his side.  
     
 


End file.
